Sunday, January 24, 2010

Hermit-the-Serge

I know everyone gets a little depressed during the winter months.. It's cold.. it's grey.. it's boring.. But I think I might have taken it to a new level. I'm pretty sure the Universe has decide that I should be a hermit... I make the attempts to go out.. to get away.. to make a break from the everyday monotony that is my life.. but the universe says.. "Umm.. Hey Serge!.. FUCK YOU.. get back in your room and watch more HBO on demand".

Here.
Small example.. and then big example.

Last night I decide I'll actually make the effort and get out of the house... Me and buddy are going to meet up, have some drinks and potentially try and meet some new people.. (FIRST MISTAKE).. ain't no place to meet people in this annoying city.. I've basically been to every bar in the city... I can't stand pretentious music snobs.. so.. live music/hipster bars are out.. I can't stand club music, retarded sluts who don't want to pay for a $2 coat check so they wait in their mini-skirts and high-heels in freezing temperatures, or suburban douche bags.. so clubs and large bars are out...

The only bars I can bear, are the ones that are filled alcoholic depressed loners like me.. and THAT ain't the best place to meet people.. so.. the night is, OF COURSE, a bust.. I should have just stayed in and watched the Die Hard marathon like I was planning to... but instead I play a couple rounds of foozeball and call it a night.

Then today I wake up and think... "fuck it.. i'm gonna get out of this house and run errands.. walk around.. maybe write... try and be part of society... You can meet people during the day, right?" I take two steps out my front door.. and the universe pisses on me.. literally.. It starts to piss rain.. Someone is saying.. "Serge.. get back in your house and stew, you dick head".. so I did... I am.. I continue to stew.

Example Two..
(granted example one does really sound like my own issues.. but I don't care)

I plan a trip with a really good friend of mine to go to Mexico.. She's in LA.. I'm in Toronto.. We're going to meet in Mexico and drink our faces off by the Ocean.. The trip is planned.. The resort is booked.. The flights are on time.. 8 hours until I get out of this frozen waste land known as Canada... Start enjoying sunshine again... It's a much needed getaway for both of us and we CAN'T WAIT..

So.. I decide I'm going to get a couple extra bucks for the cab in the morning... Just incase.. As I'm punching in the code to my dwindling bank account.. a thought pops in my head.. "Is your passport expired?".. No.. it can't be.. I'm always on top of shit like that.. I had my suit case packed a week in advance... I double wrap all my shampoo and other liquids to prevent "suitcase-explosion-mess". I'm an anal-retentive geek, and I NEVER forget shit like this... but did I?

I take off running home to see If my suspicions are correct.. 8 blocks I sprint in my winter coat... get home only to find my passport expired 10 days ago.. It's friday... the passport office is closed.. the emergency 24 hour fix is impossible until Monday.. My friend is flying out of LA a couple hours before I leave... so to take the chance of trying to get across the border with an expired passport and somehow make it to Mexico.. is a BAD idea.. she'd be stuck in Mexico alone (which is retrospect, if I was her... I would have said "FUCK YOU SERGE. I'M GOING".. but she's a much nicer person than I...)

So with 7.5 hours to go until we would have started our wondrous Mexican Adventure.. We had to cancel.. Once again I'm stuck in Toronto.. frozen.. bored.. and annoyed..

So... if the Universe wants me to be a hermit.. then I guess I should just listen...

Ugh.

G.Y.M.