SO.
I'm convinced my mom wanted a gay son.. There are three of us.. and I'm the youngest (slash best looking.. HOLA).. So.. she pops out three boys... OF COURSE she wants the last one to be gay.. who else is she going to shop with, cook with and talk about The View with.? While all my buddies played hockey, mom dropped me into dance classes.. unbeknownst to her I was more interested in the fact that I was surrounded by girls in tights then freezing my ass of with my buddies on the hockey field.. (they play it on a field, right?) Anyway... Being gay as a male dancer seems like it would have just been the easier route... All the teasing and taunting would have made sense if I actually was gay.. but unfortunately for my mom, it didn't take.
Gays 1 - Vaginas 0
Relationships... I'm pretty well versed in the world of gay monogamy.. A lot of my closest friend's love the cock.. I would never negate the fact that romantic relationships; gay, straight or other wise are difficult... But.. for me.. (just me) having to deal with the oposite sex seems to be a little more confusing... I think the gays have it a little easier in this case... Granted they get the short stick on plenty of other things.. but that's not what we're talking about here.. so fuck off..
Things they have going for them in a relationship: They double the wardrobe, they're very familiar with the "equipment" down below (you're never going to get a bad blowjob) and most importantly they don't have to deal with WOMEN! the crazy shit when it's comes to women.. the pasive-aggresive-fuck-with-you-even-though-we're-broken-up-shit.. that drives every straight man crazy at some point in their life. The only women the gays have to deal with are their fat fag hags that don't shut up about why they "can't find a man".. but then spend all their time fawning over their gay counterparts rather then hitting the gym and putting down the cookie dough. The gays can just ignore or ditch these women cause they aren't trying to sleep with them...
Gays 2 - Vaginas 0
I've witnessed first hand the "hook up"... A gay guy can literally smile at another guy.. This guy will cross a crowded bar to see "what's up?".. One guy will go.. "Hey.. you wanna go do it?" The other guy will say "yeah"... and then they go and DO IT.. this does NOT happen in the straight world... it takes FAR more work.. and usually it's not worth the money, time, and effort you put into it. Lucky gays...
Gays 3 - Vaginas 0
Now I know a lot of you are thinking.. wow. .this guy is a closet case and should just get out there and start chuggin' ween.. but it's not something I'm interested in.. I've been given every opportunity in my life to switch teams but like it says at the beggining of this blog. I like vaginas.. I suppose liking vaginas is the cross I'll have to bear.. (too religious? ) So.. even though the Gays have it 3 to 0 over vaginas.. Vaginas still win.. you know why? cause they're wonderful...
It's just too bad they're somtimes wrapped in boring and sprinkled with crazy...
ugh,
G.Y.M.
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